We’ve been tormented today by technology. Specifically certain of the “bells & whistles” in our car.  At least technology is my unoriginal palliation of unrepentant ignorance. It’s a relatively new car. Though I hasten to note that already the odometer reads 11,572 Km. This, after having driven it off the lot with only 8 Km on July 25th last (barely 2 months ago). Perhaps it will not surprise you to be told that, when we repeatedly failed to reduce the height of the automatic lift gate (for grocery removal purposes in the subterranean garage), instead of hunting around for an answer in the Owner’s Manual, we consulted Google’s Artificial Intelligence which I collectively refer to as “Hal”. Nor – may I further suspect – will it shock you to know that Hal had the answer! He’s such a resource!

In the process of initially having thumbed through what we thought to be the correct features itemized on the car’s 32″ Infotainment Screen to resolve our dilemma with the lift gate, we stumbled upon an icon under Notifications (subordinate to the main CHARGING feature) which – when it did not function – advised us to call OnStar regarding “code 311”. In our urgency we thought this overt failure may be the root of our problem with the lift gate. Although we soon discovered the correct resolution to the lift gate adversity under another heading,  nonetheless I felt it prudent to contact OnStar as recommended. So I called.

The gentleman at OnStar who answered my call was at first uninspiring.  I say this not to be mistrustful; but, by his own admission, he was unfamiliar with “code 311”.  Curiously however he immediately instructed us to go to a specific feature under SETTINGS in which he further advised me to delete the word I used to access the My Cadillac APP. Parenthetically may I be permitted to interject that the relevance of that proposal to the problem at hand entirely escaped me at the time.  I did however do as I was told.  We next encountered an unwelcome blip when, after being instructed to REMOVE then ADD my user name for the APP, I had no immediate recollection of the Password which was subsequently required.  Fortunately – that is, with the reliable assistance of my learned companion Dr. D. G. Arial, Comm of Oaths (ret’d) – we found the password on my mobile phone and all was well.

When I say, “all was well”, I mean it. All was well.  Instantly the Charging icon on the screen produced a list of charging stations accessible in the area. The error had been removed.

The combined elation deriving from these unanticipated obstacles and resolutions was astronomic. My admitted obsessiveness has, with age, done nothing but distend. And the dilution of the patience issue has equally been without demonstrable success. So – as you may well imagine – when we so freely came upon a resolution to our mundane worries, it was an event.