It is not uncommon for me to encounter a fellow septuagenarian or octogenarian who proudly proclaims the occupation of his or her grandchildren.  This morning’s brief and unexpected meeting while waiting at the grocery store was however of a singular nature. The proud grandfather remarked that one of his grandsons worked at the grocery store and the other studied civil engineering at Carleton University – then adding (significantly I thought) that everyone needs to find their niche in life.  Amazed by this unique and profound reflection, I instantly agreed. We’re not all made out for the same occupation or pursuit.

The instant agreement between me and the grandfather on this preeminent summary was not overlooked. We nodded our further approval. I asked only, “What does he look like – does he have black hair?”  Previously I had seen a young fellow moving carts about. The grandfather confirmed the boy had black hair and that he was 22 or 24 years old; and that he handles cart removal and other activities in the store.

By utter coincidence as I sat in my car in the handicap parking space awaiting my partner in the grocery store, another gentleman (whom I have known for 40 years or more) approached and we began an animated exchange which as usual involved local history.  He reported upon another young man who had begun his working career as a truck driver/delivery man and who went on to become a successful businessman. I haven’t the precise details; but what is seminal to me is that change is an inevitable part of the full story. This is not to diminish the initial expression; rather to highlight the variety of later possibilities.

Of foremost importance however is that employment of any description is noteworthy; and, like anything else in life it is a matter of perception. How we see ourselves is as far-reaching as what we do. I am reminded, for example, of my own beginning in life as a young law student. Before my final year of study I had a summer job with the office of the Judge Advocate General. On the condition that I commit to work with JAG for five years after being called to the Bar, JAG would pay all my law school, provide paid summer vacation and immediately appoint me to the rank of Captain. Impressive as it was, I declined the offer.  I opted instead for private law practice; and, within four years I had opened my own law practice in a small rural village. I distinctly recall the raised eyebrows of certain of my family and friends. While, in retrospect, I can see that I may have made a doubtful choice within certain context, I have to this day never regretted my decision to work and live in Almonte.  It is one of two choices I have made in life which I consider unassailable. And, yes, should you care to know, the other is my life partner.

The separation between working in a grocery store and studying civil engineering is no different than that between an urban law practice in a firm and that of a rural sole practitioner; which is to say, of course the spread between the two is astronomic! And the decision to opt for one or the other is critical to life’s meaning. Neither is assured to afford complete happiness; the prospects of either is open to debate and assessment; neither is incontrovertible. Strangely nonetheless the niche which each of us chooses is guaranteed to affect our well being and state of mind. And be assured that the calculation of that niche will colour the rest of our lives. Unhappily I have heard more than once of young men who, in an effort to gratify a father’s wishes or to preserve what is perceived a family tradition, have made the wrong choice; that is, they did not find their own niche in life.

Contrary to DNA, bloodline, ancestry or any other additive, we must each find our niche in life sooner than later. Failure to do so will only delay the inevitable or contaminate the present. The lack of familial support in the chosen pursuit is an embarrassment to the family, not the child. I know of nobody who is contradicted or disappointed by the adage, “If you do what you like, you’ll like what you do!”