In the past several days, paradoxically commingled with the unsurpassable fortune of fine weather, I have had the equally indescribable misfortune to acquaint myself more fatally than intended with several people of unsettling behaviour. Though I have distressed myself sufficiently – and as a result repeatedly lapsed into the vernacular to express my perturbation – the beneficial outcome has been what I am certain is common knowledge to many; namely, there are two ways to get down a river: either you know where to go or where not to go.